There is a very special brand of person that has been called to serve the dying in their final days. The caregivers who work in hospice and palliative care operate in proximity to death on a daily basis and they work to bring peace and rest to those in their stead.
For these angels of mercy, there are 5 themes that seem to repeat from those they serve. They are the issues that rob the dying of their peace. While they wrack those in their final days with regret, they can serve as instruction to those of us with much more life ahead of us.
They give us a lens of clarity to ensure that our days are not wasted.
Over the next few days we’re going to focus on the 5 regrets of the dying to ensure that in our final moments we will have no such torment.
The first regret is that they lived the life that others expected rather than the life they wanted to live.
It has been said that the wealthiest place in the world is the graveyard. In the graveyard is buried millions of great songs, books, inventions, businesses, and movements. In the graveyard is buried intentions, dreams, and aspirations.
When talking to the dying, if you ask what their dreams were, they will get a sparkle in their eye, and tell you a story.
But when you ask if they pursued it, they far too often say “no.”
Their parents wanted them to do_______.
They got married and had bills to pay so they settled for_______.
They told people their dream and it was shot down so they did_________.
It was too crazy. It was too risky. You’ll hear the rationalization that lead them to abandon their dreams. But then a silence will settle over them. And they’ll confess that they should have just gone for it.
Who are you living to please? Whose expectations are driving your decisions?
What dream or dreams have you left aside in the name of vulgarities like “reasonable, realistic,” and “safe?”
Let’s learn from those who have left us. Be true to your dream. Go for it!
Start today!
Man, this is going to be a great series of posts! Powerful lessons! Thanks, Scott!!
Thanks Eric! So honored to have a leader like you as a reader.
I think it would be valuable to hear thoughts or resources on how to find that dream or passion. So many people just drift through life and have either forgotten, or never found that dream.
Great suggestion. I’ll work on that as a future resource. Thanks so much!
What a powerful message! This really gets me thinking about what my dreams were and what I might be settling for. Thanks for the post. Can’t wait for the next message.
So well spoken….a discussion I want to have with my kids….DREAM BIG and follow those dreams!
Wow – How huge will it be if we can all get our children to grasp the significance of these truths and enter adulthood with a conviction to live by them? It would be world-changing!
This is very true!…i’m learning to Dream Bigger and Live true to my calling…and as Beth said below, encourage my kids to DReam Big and Go after it! Looking fwd to the next messages!!
Thinking about your death bed is a creepy but the absolute beat place to start with your long term planning. Love it.
I don’t think it’s creepy. I think it’s healthy. Our mortality is inescapable, and nothing pulls the present into focus like the awareness that we have limited time. My mantra is, “Begin with the end in mind.” I think about that moment all the time. And it makes decisions in the present pretty simple.
Exactly. I don’t think creepy is bad 🙂
Scott I’ve been encouraged by your message tonight. Thank you. I’m a nurse. My patients have kidney failure. I see death too often. Some of the patients share their life experiences just as you have described. I will share your message with my family and co-workers. God Bless
Wow. Thanks Gary! And thank you for the work you’re doing to care for people in those moments. That’s a special gift and calling for sure.
Scott, Scott, Scott. Words can’t describe my gratitude. Thank you seems too vague or shallow. I decided the other day to implement my dreams. Now I will add tenacity!!
Go for it! I’m cheering you on!
Such a profound message. I always do my best to encourage people to live life on their own terms. It’s sad to utter words like “if only” later in life. Thank you for sharing, Scott
For sure Sija! Thanks for encouraging others.
Pingback: The Five Regrets of the Dying: Part 2 | Scott Ross Online
Pingback: The 5 Regrets of the Dying: Part 3 | Scott Ross Online
Very encouraging and confirming to me. Thank you for sharing. Beyond blessed to be on this journey of fulfilling our God given dreams together.
Thanks!